La Crimson Femme

100 stores in eight-two pages is suspect. Reading through this stream of consciousness is definitely not sexy. Author Allupato slaps together poorly written sexual fantasies. It could be that this is an attempt at mimicking Penthouse Letters. The difference is both in the reading materials as well as the writing style.

First of all, these 100 stories are more like confession letters. While confession letters can be excitingly hot, these are not. There are too many grammar issues and poor formatting. In addition, these confessions are blurted out with no start or finish. Some of the stories contain only a haphazardly written ending. Examples of poor grammar from the first few pages are as follows.
 
tea was defiantly better for two (p. 6) The tea was resisting? Or did the author mean, definitely? These two are totally different in meaning.

Tonight the kid is at my mothers (p. 7) The person has two mothers? Or did they mean mother's?

Tommy also being sex deprived, and a big horn dog himself, loved the idea of fucking his sweat heart in public (p.11) This is just gross. Sweat heart? I'm betting the author mean sweetheart.

The entire collection is riddled with misuse of words. There are many improvement points for this book. First, instead of cramming in 100 unrelated scenes, pare it down to no more than twenty stories. Each story should contain a beginning, middle and end. If the tale is less than ten pages, it isn't enough of a story. Second, find an editor to help with the grammar and punctuation. Between the run-on sentences, fragments, misuse of words and poor formatting, the book is a difficult to read. Third, group the stories in a logical manner. This book comes across more as a cloud sourced book from several different writers sharing their dirty little secrets. Lastly, the stories should be showing rather than telling. With no semblance of plot, the sex better be good. It's not.


For example, there is a collection of "Erotic Fairy Tales". Some may quibble that they are actually nursery rhymes rather than fairy tales, but at this point, does it matter? Take this set of ten and write a short tale of 5000 words each. This would become a lovely little 50K collection of ten smexy stories. Instead, the reader is treated to a four paragraph, half page scene about Humpty Dumpty Ass Fucker to the Extreme. There is no character development, no plot and no world building. Even the sex is not extreme or arousing. This is not a book filled with 100 Hot and Sexy Stories.

*provided by BDSM Book Reviews